You and your spouse going through a divorce are probably very disappointing. If there are children involved it is even worse. Contrary to popular belief, most legal disputes are usually resolved by a settlement without court proceedings.
One of the least painful resolution processes is a mediation divorce. If you feel that there will not be much dispute on key issues and that you are both willing to work together to resolve any issues, it probably is the solution for you.
It is a negotiation between you and your spouse of all the legal aspects of a divorce and even more.
You hire a mediator as a coach, a legal consultant and advisor that knows the routine to remove the burden of learning the process yourself, avoid mistakes, obtain recommendations and file the appropriate documentation to the court.
The key objectives the mediator will aim are:
- facilitate communications;
- promote understanding;
- focus the parties to help them reach their own agreement;
- achieve an equitable, legally sound and acceptable divorce agreement for both parties;
- keep the divorce process expenses low;
- avoid trauma and drama;
- minimize post-divorce hostility and controversy.
Mediation have many advantages over traditional lawsuits, including:
- Much faster: few meetings, usually within a few weeks;
- Easier: the spouses decide of the timetable. No pressure from external sources;
- Much less expensive: one mediator for both, few meetings, less negotiation. There are even non-profits mediation services at low fee and even free services in some area.
- informal: focus on the needs of the parties instead of procedures;
- confidential: unlike court cases, nor records or transcripts;
- saves relationship: it is a collaborative process that preserves relationships;
- control: the parties have more control over the process and the outcome;
- no humiliation: there isn’t the winner/loser context. No one has his fault exposed and suffer from humiliation;
- easier for family, friends, co-worker: difficult dispute and lawsuits spills on the circles of the spouses.
In a mediation, the process is based on the assumption that both spouses are open to discussion and ready to work at reaching an agreement together. Consequently, it is a little less formal and they both meet with the mediator together to discuss and prepare the agreement.
A divorce mediator may or may not be a lawyer.
The end result
Reaching an agreement is not mandatory. If, during the process, the negotiation becomes difficult, the mediator may decide to continue the process meeting the spouses separately. If the process reaches an impasse, they still have the right to litigage.
If everything goes well, the agreement at the end is signed by both spouses. The written agreement is a contract.
HOW TO FIND A divorce mediator
Ideally, ask people you trust that actually used a mediator before you. It usually is better to get referrals when choosing a mediator for such an important issue.
You can search for a divorce mediator near you to start with.
Example of search
¨Divorce mediator near chicago¨
or you prefer that the mediator to be a lawyer try
¨Divorce lawyer mediator near los angeles¨